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We were horseplaying and
After a few drinks Arif invited me back to his…a kind invitation I simply couldn't say no to
It was a 20-minute train ride – possibly one of the longest 20 minutes of my life: we were both on fire, super excited
Finally, the train stopped
Everyone's first queer, and have always find the
I had zero idea of “how to bottom”
We spent most of the hour in silence until he suddenly asked if I wanted to share a smoke, which we did
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We went straight upstairs to his room, opened the door, and sunk into his bed (completely forgetting to close the door behind us
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It felt like I could breathe for the first time in my 21 years of existence
As bad as that relationship turned out, I was grateful for that first experience with him
Sneakily we approached our hands, touching each other little by little but without interrupting the conversation